Lets Try This Over Again, Take 2 Please?
by april-amphetamine
Summary: Paul has lost everything and gained little back. The Curse takes it away from him again, but gives him a new family, but does he want it after all of the hurt they have caused him? Maybe she's the only one who can save him now.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N Okay, I'm sorry if this is kind of dumb, but this is my first fanfic and I just had to start publishing my own ideas. I never get completely satisfied with other fanfics for twilight, so I decided, eh why the hell not? So enjoy my first try/chapter and feel free to review. I'm open to ideas! :D**

I knew that I was going insane. I kind of expected it. I just didn't expect it to be so... I hadn't expected it to go this far. I look down into the small, clear steam of water to see the reflection of a silver wolf. The next thing I know, I hear my lost best friend Jared in my head. I just hope that I'm dreaming, but at the same time I'm hoping that I'm not.

_Dude, seriously! Where the fuck are you?_

_Wh-what..? _I sense another form near me in the thick forest. I turn my head to see another wolf. I've seen wolfs be his medium brown, but never this big. I swear I saw the wolf roll it's eyes.

_Thanks for answering my question, dumbass._

_Jared..?_ I step closer to this wolf, supposedly being Jared. _What the hell is wrong with me..? I'm a fucking monster..._

He laughs humorless. _Welcome to the club. Well come on Paul, lets get back to Sam so he can explain this whole mess._

I blink a few times. Then the anger starts to build up back inside me like it used to. _Yeah, and I'm supposed to just trust you like that? You fucking left me for some fucking gang with Uley. You really expect me to be all buddy buddy with you again? What the hell ever. I'm going home. The same home you knew I'd be fucking alone in. You were the closest thing to family I had left. Now I'm more screwed up than I was before. _The first tear since I lost my family rolled down the matted fur below my large eyes. I brushed of the useless emotion and replaced it with anger. _I want nothing to do with you or Uley. Just leave me alone. You screwed up with this already, just give up on me. _I couldn't read the emotion in his dark eyes before I ran off, but I saw more moisture in his eyes than normal. Maybe it had to do with being a wolf.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys, thanks for reading to the second chapter, I know that the first was short, but you know, it was more of an intro than anything :P anyways, this is my second chapter of my first fanfic. I kind of pictured Paul alone do be just straight depressing, so I decided to emphasize on it a bit. But anyways, I'm just talking to myself now, so here's chapter two!**

As I ran home, or to the house I live in rather, I couldn't help but to think about the real family I used to have. Or the only part I cared about besides Jared.

I was thinking about my mom.

She was the most beautiful thing I had in my life. She had the weirdest, most interesting hair. Being only half-native, she had bright red in her dark hair that you could see in plain sight. She had chocolate brown eyes that you could practically see through. Her nose was pointed, a little broken from her sports days, but only I noticed it. I inherited her dimples, she told me so, though no one has seen them for quite some time. But she was so perfect and she's the only person I'd ever really loved.

Well, I never worried about love. I learned from my experience that love was just something that you suffered from later. If I never loved my mom, maybe I never would have been the heartless asshole I am now. It wouldn't have hurt as bad when I lost her.

It was all my fault that she died anyways. I was sick and she was taking care of me, even though she was hurting anyways. My father had just finished off his second sixpack of the day, he said he wanted to get more. Mom told him that she didn't want him drinking and he needed to get a job, since we were running off of her substitute teacher wage. He has anger issues as it is, which is where I developed them, but when he was drunk, he was dumb and angry.

He got even more angry and so came the part I so much hated. When I was younger, the only thing I could do was either watch and cry or run and cry. At this time, I was 16 so I immediately brushed off my sickness and went to defend my mother. I blacked out at one point after my father had struck me. When I had awaken, I was in the hospital. The doctors wouldn't take much time talking to me and the nurses avoided me. Days went by as my body healed and I was growing concerned. My mother was no where to be found, not a word was said about her. I still hadn't heard of any news past my blackout. My release day comes and I go to my home excited to see my mother only to find my house empty. Instead, I find an old news paper that reads over on the heading "Terrible Crash In La Push, Only A 16 Year Old Boy Makes It Out." The realization rushes through me as I finally embrace the truth that I had known since I had awaken in the hospital.

I was alone.

The article stated that my mother had been taking me to the hospital for internal bleeding and a concussion. On the way there, there was an unexplained accident that ended with our truck in the ditch upturned and my mother dead. My father was no where to be seen and I was left all alone.

I was left with everything that my mom owned, including a trust fund I new of, leaving me with much wealth and nothing else. I was empty. At the young age of 16, I became an alcoholic. I came home from work every day, since I quit school so I could pay for the bills without using the trustfund, and I drank until I passed out. Jared had been the one to stay with me and get drunk with me every day up until about 6 months ago. One day, he never came to bring me more beer. The next day, no sign of him. This only made me drown myself more into numbness.

I found myself in my living room with booze in my hand. The bottle was empty, but I had no buzz. Goddammit. I can't even be numb anymore. This wolf shit just gets worse and worse.

As I leave to get more to drink, I am stopped by none other than Sam Uley. Fucking great.

His face, oddly, wasn't the same ice cold stare. Instead, he looked rather sympathetic. What the hell ever! I don't want his bullshit sympathy. I hadn't realised I had cried at all until I wiped my itching eyes.

"Look, Paul please liste-" Sam began until I interupted him.

"What? I already figured it out, the legends are true, I'm not an idiot. Is there anything else you want to tell me?" my sarcasm thick and I was shaking a little from my annoyance.

Jared came into my view from behind the gang. I stood there, slightly ashamed of myself, only slightly. I was still angry with him.

"Please sit down for a second, Paul. I know you're mad, but I had no choice... I could have hurt you as a new wolf. I know that doesn't make up for it, but just give the pack a chance. We are all brothers now, you can have a family again." By this time, he'd walked his way to me, the other guys cautious and nervous. I could smell their tension.

"Would you guys chill out? Damn, I'm not an rabid animal, I can control myself." Sam made a gesture to the guys for them to stand down.

"I still don't want anything to do with your Goddamn gang shit. Now get the fuck out of my house before I call the cops." They all were surprised to see me so calm. Am I really that bad? Has my rep been this serious?

"Paul, just would you fucking listen for five minutes? I mean would it kill you to just give the pack a chance?" Jared was inching closer to me as he said each word, his own body vibrating like mine.

I push him away from me and start to growl. Wow, what the fuck? Growling , too?

Sam jumps between the building tension between my late best friend.

"I command you both to chill out." I could almost taste the athority in his voice. I knew immediatly that he was my leader and alpha.

"Paul, you will be part of this pack and help to protect our people, it's who you are meant to be and I demand that you do so." His dark eyes were piercing. All I could do was nod as the shock left my face, I knew that this command shit was going to get old fast.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys! Thanks so much for your response to my story [: It makes me so much more motivated to do this! Just to tell you, and you might not understand until you finish reading this chapter, but I don't agree with drug or alcohol abuse, but I'm not writing about myself, now am I? I apologise to any reader who is offended by my fanfic for language or other types of things against personal morals, but I write according to character and once I get myself into this character, I see through their eyes and use their morals. And I can't promise that every chapter will be as exciting as another, but I can only hope you love it! Anyways, enjoy my thrid chapter! I love you guys! And please review!**

I phased so that Uley could explain the rest of the resonsabilities of being a wolf and the posabilities of imprinting. I saw through his thoughts about the famous Leah-Sam story. I felt nothing of it since I cared nothing for either, but I suddenly felt some sympathy for Leah. She had all this love then lost it all to fate. I suppose I could relate in a way.

I realised Sam was growling at my thoughts and I growled back. Alpha or not, I still hated this asshole.

_Watch your mouth, Paul. I don't want to have to hurt you but I will take no disrespect. I can't stop you from being a dickhead but I won't tollerate it towards me or your pack brothers._

I scowl at him and look towards the sky. _If I had my own choice, I would have nothing to do with this damn pack anyways. And whether you like it or not _Alpha_ I still hate your fucking guts and the commands you give are bullshit._

He began to growl as soon as my mouth opened but it seriously increased as my smartass mouth continued. _Well whether you like it or not, Paul, I'm still your alpha and you must follow my commands. I don't make the choices with who gets put in this pack, and if I did, I would have never put your ass in here. Dispite this, I have to deal with what I'm given in order to protect my people. So shut your mouth and do as I say._

I knew I'd have no chance to win this fight because he'd probably just alpha command me to shut the fuck up. At this, he growled and turned on me. I thought he was going to go in for the kill, but he was interupted by a piercing howl in the night. He takes off, myself instinctfully going as well.

The howl was coming from the other two patroling._ Sam, we caught a scent of blood sucker._

_Sam- Shit. Well here's your training Paul. Paul?_

I wasn't going to answer. I had it's scent and my wolf wouldn't let me get away from my instincts. I was all animal.

_Sam- Ha, he's a natural. No training for now. I'm really impressed with you, Paulie._

At this name, I growled. But the affectionate name was something my mother had called me, and I surprisingly liked it in a way.

_Sam- Hey man, I didn't mean to offend you._

I just mentally okay-ed Sam but brushed it off when I caught sight of my catch. It was female, sexy for a leech, but I hated her already. She wasn't far off, her green-tinted hair was shining, getting still closer to me. I took my kill as I pounced onto her small body. She attempted to bite me, but I recipricated her and took an arm off, the sound almost metallic in my ears. Her scream was earily similar. I chose to go straight on for the kill. Her head was soon off her body and still moving in a disturbing way. Jared came up behind me in his human form, but naked.

I blink a bit as I look away. He laughs apoligetically and throws the lit match onto the dissembled body. The purple smoke hurt my nose in a disgusted way that I wouldn't have been able to stand under normal circumstances.

I felt proud of my first kill, maybe this wolf shit wouldn't be so bad. I get to kill the blood suckers and maybe I could really have the brothers I never wanted. But I still didn't feel right. I had my best friend back and then some. It wasn't Sam, I wasn't as angered with him as I make it seem, I just needed some one to be an asshole to.

_Thanks dick head. _Sam thought in a brother kind of way.

I couldn't shake this missing peice of my life. Even as I unphased at my back door a while later, I still hadn't gotten it out of my mind.

I think I'll be okay, since I have a welcoming party or some shit. Sam said something about rez shine and peace pipe. Maybe I might get maybe a little buzzed. I felt excitement in my stomach, not from my future intoxication but from just the first kind of any celebration I've had for myself in quite some time.

For the first time in the longest time, I felt hope.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys! Okay, I've made my choice on the girl, and I just don't think that Bella will fit the part that I want as Paul's imprint, she isn't strong enough as a character and she just annoys me. Besides, the special thing I had an epiphany on and I know almost exactly everything I want in her! Bella just does not fit the same characteristics that I want, so Idk what to do! Anyways, I think it will turn out nicely either way :] so here's chapter 4 guys! Thanks so much for reading!**

After that day with Sam and the blood sucker, I've _acted_ like I did before Jared ignored me: I act cocky and perverted.

I can't say it's not me, but it's not the same me as I once was. I used to be an A student. Ha just messing, I've always been a trouble student, but I usually tried. After the accident, I really had no choice but to quit anyways becasue of the money difficulties I was condemned to have. I'm thinking about going back to it, since I'm going to need a real job sooner or later. 

"Yeah, he told me that I can go back as a Junior if I can pass Sophmore exams," I told Jared as we shared a beer. I know it's useless if I want the same effect as it used to give, but it's a habit.

I'm still just a bit hurt over the ignoring me shit. I guess I'll need to suck it up and play the role of a sarcastic, perverted asshole.I can't say that's not me, but I can say that I hate that about myself.

I can't take back all the girls I fucked and threw away to get a sexier girl. I can't really change what people think of me. Hell, I wouldn't blame people if they hated me.

"Well are you going to?" Jared asked, breaking me from my deep thoughts. I wonder how long we were sitting there in silence. Wow, I really am an idiot.

"I think I will, if I want to make something of this shitty situation, I guess I have to." I look down, hiding my scowl that I put on ever so often.

"It's not like you're in Hell, make the best of what you got, dude. I think that..." and then after that, all I heard was Charlie Brown's parents. Wah wah wah wah wah. I don't know if he ever realised when I do this. I can't help but block him out when he rambles, it's a wonder I dealt with it all the years.

"-re you listening to me? Okay, what the fuck ever. I'll get you when my shift is over. Bye assface," and he closes my door. I'm left alone again. I wonder if anyone thinks about me when I'm not around. I know none of my family does, since my mother was disowned from her father since she was a love baby and I never knew my father's parents. I hardly even knew my father. I could give a shit less about him anyways.

My own rambles were interupted by a scratch on the door. I get off of the couch and walk to the recurring scratches. I open it to find it storming. How could I not have noticed this? I start to close the door, but unfortunately I had to notice the whining of a puppy. Husky, I think? His baby blue eyes looked up at me, I couldn't help my self, I had a huge soft spot for animals. I picked him up to find him being a her. Oh great, please don't be in heat, I get enough dogs in my house as it is.

I took her back over to the couch and checked her for tags. Nothing. The only thing I found was a ring in her left ear. I wonder if I got a peircing if I'd still have it as a wolf. The pup looked up at me as if she could hear me thinking. Hell, for all I knew she did. It's not like she can tell the whole world. She sure was a cute dog, though. I'm might even miss her when the person realises she's gone.

By the time I came back to my senses, she was in my lap and I was petting her. She fell asleep on me, well crap I'll have to wake her up to go to bed.

Before I could pick her up, she woke up on her own and starting whining again. All I saw after that was a huge blur of black and white running for my room. I get up to go after her but then I hear a knock on my door.

"Paul, I know you're in her!" God, please don't let it be who I think it is. "I know you can fucking hear me! I need my money from the insurance, you can't keep it all to yourself you selfish little prick!"


	5. Chapter 5

**So who likes the dog? I love animals soooo much and I had to put something like her in there. Her appearance will make all the difference later! And sorry if this chapter is typed wrong or something looks wrong or I write it wrong because I have a head ache from putting in new gauges last night, don't do them, I'm telling you! they're cute ones though [: anyways, I don't know exactly where this chapter will end up, but here's my newest chapter!**

Why does he have to be here now? When everything gets semi-normal and I acctually feel happy, well not now.

I go towards the door, which by now has become earily quiet. I think it may be dumb to be so scared of a mortal but I can't help the fear I have for my father. I open the door only to find my empty front porch. He's gone. Maybe it was my imagination.

A wheeze came from my right and I see my father on the ground, one hand clutching to his chest and the other pointing towards the woods. My first instinct was that it was my pack brothers, but I couldn't sense their presence. All I can see is a figure that even I can't make out with my wolf eyes.

I feel this odd presence going away, pulling me towards it in the weirdest way. I jump from my porch and past the nearly lifeless figure of my father. Oh yeah, he's dying. I don't need this now!

I reluctantly run back into my house and call for an ambulance, even if he doesn't deserve it, he's a human and it's my right to protect him, but I stay in the house to keep from finishing him off myself. I go out just before the ambulance gets here, so it won't be unusual. He's still hardly alive, but he makes the effort to speak.

"I sti won te moey..," and if those were his last words, which I'm sure they aren't, then he meant them.

As they pulled out and away, I start my way in the house. When I get into the house, I see the husky pup dart out. Devestation clear on my face, I run off with her. She's much too fast to be a normal animal. I can tell that much.

She made the short distance to the woods and unbelievably, she gets even faster. This is around as fast my wolf can go normal speed. I have to push it in human form. Maybe I need to phase so I can't lose sight of her.

We've ran for a good hour, I decided to stay human. I didn't want to scare her more than she already is. I start to feel the same pull again and now I'm not chasing the dog, I'm going to toward this pull. The dog is still running in front of me, she must feel the pull, too.

I let my mind roam blank and the impulse to phase is still low. I always feel the need to phase when I run unless I''m around fragil things like other animals and mortal people, but this form feels very immortal.

I notice the pup slowing and so I slow my pace, the pull getting a stronger hold on me. I see a new figure in the short distance, a feminine one. Why is there a girl in the middle of the woods? She had lightly tanned skin, her partial native blood obvious. Her hair was half way to her elbows and it was wild and curly, a vey distinct blue tint in her dark curls. She was a very beautiful girl in the woods... She was wearing a bright blue bikini under a loose, cropped shirt and a small skirt that showed off the long, slightly less tanned legs. She wasn't too small but she was far from big. She looked perfect. I immediately felt self concious of my own self.

She kneeled down to pick up the pup. Her natural beauty astounded me. She was examining the dog for scratches or marks or whatever and she pushed her hair behind her ear. I noticed that she had about four peircings in her ear, all of them resembling the one in the dog's ear. This was her owner. She stood up and rolled her eyes as if some one had said something annoying. As she stood up, she stared at the ground and started towards me. Had she not noticed I was here? When she was about five feet away, she looked up and into my eyes.

I thought she was absolutely beautiful before, but now she was a goddess. She had such an interesting face. A sharp nose, her jaw was bold. Her cheek bones were almost too high. Her mouth was all sharp angled besides the deep curve of her bottom lip. Her eyes were a dark emerald that faded to a bright gold into the middle, her dark lashes framed them, making it hard to look away from them.

I felt her, all of her. I had never though so much intense beauty of anyone. She was the gravity to the Earth, she was the beat of my heart. I even knew now that she was my imprint.

My Imprint.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey ladies and gentlemen! I deleted the author's note I had and moved all of the chapters back so if you haven't already, read the chapter before this! I hope you guys loved the description of our new lady, should I say lucky? I'm so so so so so so sorry for not updating! I've been busy with school and projects and my computer has been being stupid, plus a bunch of personal bull crap. And I took my guages out so no headaches! I'll say it again, do NOT do it! And without further ado, I present you with my latest chapter!**

**~~ April 3**

I reach out to make sure this was all so real... She hasn't looked away from me or backed away, good sign. Maybe she thinks I'm a creep. What if I'm being weird? What if I do something to make her uncomfortable... What if she leaves me? No, I couldn't lose her...

I hadn't noticed that I was on my knees until she kneeled in front of me and looked at me with concern. I see her mouth moving but I can't make out any words, there's too much noise... Is that me?

She puts her hand on my forhead, dazing me and relaxing me. As my senses come back to normal, I realise that the noise was coming from my chest. I look at her in the eyes and I stop breathing all together. Her pure innocense and beauty captivates me.

I realise how ridicules I sound to just myself and I look down and away from her gaze. How could I allow myself to think like such an obsessed freak? I'm acting like a complete fool. Hell, I don't even know her name!

"Shiloh" she tells me as I look at her in complete question.

"What? You asked my name, didn't you?" she asked, her confusion awing me. She's adorable.

I shake my head. "I was thinking it, but I'm sure you didn't hear... What?" She was looking at me with what might be... curiosity?

"Oh, it's nothing. I'm just kinda crazy. I don't know why I might be thinking..." The last sentence was almost too soft for my wolf ears. Her voice, though, is almost as beautiful as she is.

"I'm Paul," I say as I reach my hand up to shake hers. She pulls me completely off of the ground. Wow, and how much do I weigh?

Noticing the shock on my face, she goes a bit white. "Okay, uhhmm I know we just met but you don't seem like a typical girl sweetheart." Sweetheart? Am I asking to get killed?

"It's nothing I could explain. Not easily atleast. I have to trust you, dollface," she said with a smirk. Well damn, I've known her for five minutes and already she's making fun of me? AND making me blush? I am going to absolutely hate imprinting. I can't be fake-Paul with her either. She'd probably slap me and say fuck that.

"Do I seem that mean?" she said. Come on, she can't be reading my mind!

"You're not so normal yourself." I am so fucked now. I think about running but the same feelings of being crushed come back in.

"W-what makes you say that?" I can feel the blood leave my face.

"Your body heat, first off. Those tempratures kill even some animals. And... other things that I can't say." She has secrets. I know it.

"You tell me, I tell you." She was shaking her head before I finished my sentence, but before she could reply, I hear a howl of my pack brother. All of a sudden, bleach and nasty perfume hits my nose. I have to get her away from here.

**Once again, I am so sorry for updating so late! Forgive me, my beloved readers!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello dearest of readers! I'm sorry about the whole not updating thing, you know how the life of a writer is :P but I wrote this entire chapter to have it deleted when my power went out so ugh :/ so this is my second try! I'm gunna get to writing before I forget what I thought it out as XD**

**~~April!**

I look down at the ground to try to get myself calm so I don't phase on her. I clench my fists to where my nails almost rip into my palms, but atleast it's helping I hear her breathing get rougher. Well great, now I scared her. I attempt to look at her face to quicken my calming process and reassure her but she's looking away with fury playing on her face. What the hell did I do to make her mad?

When I thought that, she looked back up at me and I swear I alomst whimpered at how beautiful and terrifying she was.

Her face softened a little bit at my obviously humorous expresion. She immediately got serious and a bit... nervous? "Look, I can't allow you to get hurt by ignorance, but there's some things in this world that you don't know of that can hurt you. As a matter of fact, there's one near us right now. Don't look at me like I'm crazy when I say this but it's a-"

"A vampire," I interupted her rant with a smirk. "I know, I kill them on a regular basis. How in the Hell did you know about them?" She had the funniest face on when I said that. "I'm not as dumb as I look sweetheart. Now tell me how you know, please."

She opened her mouth to speak but she was cut off by an impatient howl. "Uhhh hold that thought," I said with a half-smile as I turned to phase, forgeting to take off my shorts. _Well dammit._

_Rip your shorts again? -Sam_

_Oh shut the fuck up. Where's the leech? -Me_

_About twohundred feet in front of you? Dumbass. -Jared_

I roll my eyes at the smartass but I lose train of thought when I spot the blonde bloodsucker. Tall one, might actually be a challengefor once!

_Stop being a dickwad and just kill it! -Sam_

I do as he says - partially - and I run up on the nomad, catching the nasty smell. Ugh, I hate the leech-stench. As I get close enough, I pounce on him and take a mouthful of his neck. And the taste is just... Nevermind. I think I might take my time with this one, since he ruined my perfectly good time with my girl. Bastard.

_Wait, what? -Jared_

_You imprinted? Why didn't you tell me? -Sam_

_Maybe because it happened thirty minutes ago? -Me_

_Well damn, she looks pretty hot from the looks of it! -Jared_

I start to growl at Jared as I take bigger chunks of the leeches arm. _Back off bitch, she's my girl._

_My bad, my bad! I didn't mean to offend, I was just stating the obvious man! -Jared_

_Just shut up, Jared. You're only going to make him angrier. -Sam_

I nodded my wolf-head once, decapitating the bloodsucker, his body squirming and heaving under my great paws. My mind went strangely quite... Jared must have phased.

_It's almost sad when you know sometimes. -Sam_

Jared's human form comes into veiw with a matchbox in hand. He's wearing shorts this time, thank the spirits! Jared sees my relief and rolls his eyes. "Ha ha, very funny fucker. Maybe I shouldn't give you the spares that I brought?"

At his words, my eyes light up and I make my sad face. He shakes his head at me and throws the shorts in my direction. I take them and run off in the other direction to change and get a shirt and blanket from my house. I don't think I'm going home tonight, I have too many questions for my Shiloh to answer.

**And I thank you :]**


	8. Chapter 8

**Keeping my A/N short today!**

**~~April!**

I go back to the spot in the forest where she was and I couldn't find her. She left me. Her scent was still fresh and I found a trail. She must have gotten lost. I run back to my place to get what we might need for our intervention.

I phase at my back door, pulling on the shorts and running up my stairs to grab a shirt. I open the door and I notice how messy it is for the first time in... forever! I'll do it later, I've have better things to do. I pull on the first thing I put my hands on and bolt downstairs to grab a blanket and a jacket for her, she's got to be cold out there. Wow, I really have lost absolutely any sign of being a guy. Oh well.

As I get closer to the door, I hear a familiar scratching noise. Really? I open the door and sure enough my little husky pup comes running in. Outside the door, though, I heard heavy breathing and the smell of honeysuckle hits my nose. Shiloh. Guess I won't be needing the blanket tonight. I open the door and find her sitting on my steps to my porch, breathing eraticly. Without her knowing my presence, I pick her up bridal style and carry her inside. Her face was just priceless, I couldn't help but laugh at her.

"You... You're a wolf," she said, looking at me knowingly. I look away from her gaze as I set her on my couch. I sit across from her in a chair, still not making eye contact.

"Please look at me Paul," she said, her voice heartbreaking. I look at her, terrified to lose her by a single word. When she looks into my eyes, she looks as if she's about to break down herself with guilt. "I didn't mean... Awe Paul, please don't look that way..."

I look down again, afraid to see her reaction to what I'm about to tell her. "Shiloh... I am a wolf, a shape shifter. I am what my people would call a protector. I'm cursed with this and I have no choice but to be it."

I look at her with my asshole-mask on, ready to be killed., but when I met her beautiful emerald-gold eyes that spoke sympathetic words to me, I gave up that part of me. I really can't be fake with her. "You aren't cursed, you're gifted Paul. Your wolf is important to your people, you save them everyday. You saved me. I thought I'd have to be the one to save you, but you took me quite off guard there." She spoke the truth, I could see through her. How much more perfect could she get?

"This doesn't seem like something you'd tell just anyone... So explain. Paulie," she said with a breath-taking smile.

After the dazzling wore off, I look down again, too scared to that this will ruin it all. "Shiloh, there's a thing to this curse... It forces you to be with some one even if you don't want to be, pretty much saying that they're your soul mate, your perfect match..." I stayed quiet for a moment, getting nervous when she didn't say anything. I look up to her but she was looking down and her eyes were closed, sorrow pinching her eyebrows together. "Shy, are you alri-"

"You already matched, aren't you." It wasn't really a question.

I take a big breath and I swollow down my heart. "It's called imprinting. And yes, I am. But let me explain. It's-"

"Can I meet her? I mean I don't really know you at all, but I have a strong bond with you for some reason. It's almost as if I was meant to meet you." She... wait, what?

She saw the confusion on my face. "You're paired, right? Is it really so weird that I want to meet her?"

"Well no, but you already know her," I say as I stand and start towards her. Her face hints confusion but the husky pup starts growling at her. Shiloh looks down at her with daggers in her eyes. "Really Serenity? Shut up."

I sit next to her and take her hand. "I imprinted on you, Shiloh. I know this may be a lot for you to take in and I hate that you should feel forced at all to be with me. You don't have to be with me if you don't want to but please tell me you will be. I can be anything you want. I can be a friend, a brother, and I can be your... your lover. Just tell me how to be and I will be it for you. I will do anything for you." At these words, I hear... Serenity? Yeah Serenity... wimpering at me.

"She has a crush on you." I blink a few times at what Shy just said.

"Uhh say what?"

"Just... Yeah. If you haven't already noticed, I can read animals' minds. And yours a little bit, since you're half animal as well."

The new information hit me like a ton of bricks. No, not really. "Kinda obvious, don't you think?"

"Maybe so, but there's more to it. See the ring in her ear?" She points to Serenity's piercing.

"Yeah, I wondered about that!"

"Yes, well it makes it easier for me to comunicate with her. I have four of them, see?" She shows me her ear full of rings. I noticed before, but I didn't know what they were for. Well, I kinda had a hunch.

"And you're telling me this because..? Don't get me wrong, this is fucking awesome, but you have to have a reason for telling me...?" I look for an explaination in her eyes, but she blushes at my words. Hehe, cute as Hell. Wait, why blush though?

"Well... I was wondering if I could peirce yours...?" She was smiling so innocently and cute, I almost couldn't say no... almost.

"No! I don't want my ear pierced!" I yelled, not meanly, but playfully.

"Well fine then. Meaniebutt," she pouted, making it even harder for me.

"Maybe."

"Really?" she said, so excited it was as if she was five and I told her we were going to Disney Land.

"I said maybe. Hell, I've known you for an hour and you're asking me to puncture my body?" I was baffled at her!

She smiled brightly at me. "Yeah!"

**And so goes the new relationship between our little Paulie and Shiloh! How is it so far?**

**~~April 3**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey guys, once again so sorry about my absence :/ I've had big problems with my computer... Every single file I had and all of my programs were completely deleted so ugh! All of my back-up chapters are gone. But I will be trying to update like once every few days :] Anywho, I'm going to try and get this story going good so I can start up a new one soon! I can't choose my topic but I know it's going to be about one of my wolfies :D So onward to my story!**

**I don't own Telephone by Lady Gaga and Beyonce. Great song though :]**

**~~April**

I sit on the beach, listening to the ocean flow and picking the sand for sea glass. Thoughts of yesterday go through my mind. I could never imagine some one being so wonderful and perfect for her to accept me just like that, wolf and all. Shiloh pulls her hair behind her ear to show off her rings. I wonder... if she has one on Serenity, then what are the other three for..?

"I have other animals? Dummy," she says, smirking at my surprised face.

"You know, it's not fair that you can read me but I can't read you!" I say, pushing her out of her crouched stance over the pile of sea glass.

"I can do it only when I'm trying to read your mind you ass, I bet you could, too, if you tried to use what little brain that you have," she said, that same adorable smirk still in place with humor playing in her eyes.

I look out to the water to clear my dazed thoughts and attempt to push through her mind barrier. All I can reach is a clear feel of her emotions and her vague, immediate thoughts. I know for one thing that she feels.. guilty for some reason. "What is it?"

"Oh, you caught that?" she says, her guilt thick in her voice. "_Stop callin', stop callin' I don't wanna talk-"_ She blushes and answers her phone.

"Hey, I'm kinda busy right now," she says into the phine, flustered and embarrassed. She stands and walks towards the tree line. I can here a masculine voice on the other line and this makes me growl.

"I know, but I'm with... Jessica. We're at the beach and I completely spaced on the plans." -Pause- "Yeah, I know, I'll make it up to you, I swear." -Pause again- "I'll call you when me and Jess leave, okay?" -Small pause- "Yeah, you too." She hangs up the phone.

She walks slowly back towards our little spot, her guilt obvious on her face.

"Jessica..?" I say, trying to hide the accusation and be a little humorous. I think I failed.

She look flustered even more so than earlier. I could tell that she was uncomfortable.

"I can tell that you need time to think about something so I'm just going to go..." I stand to my feet and start walking to my truck. I try to hide my hurt from what I perseve just happened: she has a boyfriend that doesn't know about me and she has to hide me from him.

"Wait Paul please let me explain myself..." she said, putting her hand onto mine, a shock running through my entire body. I turn to my imprint, unnable to hide my embarrasement. I attempt my mask of ass-hole Paul. Didn't work. "Why didn't you tell me? I can fight the imprint if you want, I don't have to be around you like I am. I just wish I wasn't so bad that he couldn't know about me." Her eyes were getting moist and her lip quavered a little. This girl was going to kill me. She colapsed to the sand and dragged me with her, her hand still clutching to mine as if it was holding her to the earth. I sank to her, snaking my arms around her shaking waist and pulling her onto my lap. "I didn't mean to be an ass Shy, please don't hate me... I just feel like I lost you before I even knew it. I just want to be in your life, I don't care if I'm your friend and only your friend, I just need to be around..." I say, rocking her, my hand still intertwined with hers.

She looks up at me with her blood-shot, puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks. All of this and she has yet to amaze me with her pure beauty.

"Paul, I love him," she said, pulling her hand from mine and looking to her lap. "I don't know about anything anymore. I met you and I'm opened up to this whole other part of my already screwed-up world that I've never known and you imprinted on me. The entire experience has changed everything in my life and I'm not exactly sure about anything anymore..."

"If you're so unsure about all of it anymore then why even be with anyone?" I ask, my jealousy flaring but I push it to the back of my mind.

She looks up at me, stone cold expression but her eyes showing me all of the sorrow and regret of the world. She was radiating the same emotions so strongly that I didn't have to try and read her to know.

"Because, Paul, I'm engaged to him."


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello my precious.. Lol justtt kidding :] Sorry about the non-updating, computer turned off and never turned back on soooo yeah :/ and I bet you loved her being engaged huh? XD I know, I'm mean. Anyways, I'm gunna get on to the important things!**

**~~April 3**

"Because, Paul, I'm engaged to him."

I close my eyes at her words, my subconcious alowing me to finally know for sure what I wouldn't let myself believe. I stay motionless and she does as well for the longest time. I let my head start tilting down to where I'm certain that I'm looking at her hands. I open my eyes and search for the courage to either: a. walk away from her and let her live on and be happy with this nameless man, b. get angry at her and make her feel terrible for not being truthful, or c. be honest with her and confess my real true feelings about her and let her know that she can be happy with me.

I open my mouth to speak my decision. I'm not really sure how long I sat with my mouth hanging open looking like an utter idiot trying to find the words until these spilled out.

"I can tell you now, Shiloh, I think it's really impossible for me to ever get mad at you and I'd never hurt you not only because I could never hit a woman but also because you're my imprint. I could leave you alone if you want me to because I want you to be happy. I don't want to stand in the way of your love. I'm not even going to ask to meet him since I'm sure it would be hard on you or make things complicated."

I stop talking to look up and register her feelings only to find her looking to her hands as I was doing. I reach to her face and under her chin to tilt it so I can see her emotions. She reluctantly allowed me to do so and I immediately regretted it. Her expression broke my heart. She had been crying and she had the eyes of a puppy looking up to my face and all I wanted to do was hold her tight and tell her everything was okay.

"Please, just please do it," she said, her voice was cracking. I'm not sure if it was because she asked me to do it or if it was because I was about to combust at the force the imprint was pushing me to touch her and hold her. Maybe it's because I felt like total shit for making this beautiful angel feel guilty and cry over me, but I turned her so that I was holding her like a child and she placed her arms around my neck as she began to cry. We sat there just holding each other in comfort as I rocked her to ease her tears. I've been close to girls physically like this but the feel of it was so different... I could never explain the feelings stirring in me but I know that no person has made me feel like this at all. No woman has given me these... these butterflies and made me feel this hurt.

I thought for a moment that maybe it was just the imprint, but I had this small thing inside of me telling me that it was something more... And then a memory was brought on to me. A memory of my mother, of me holding her after one of my father's fits and he had hurt her. I was holding her to comfort her and trying to let her know that I loved her and I didn't want to let anything hurt her...

I stop rocking her when I realise that her sobs had seised. Her arms had droopped to rest on my inner elbow and her breathing was slow and relaxed. She had fallen asleep. I kept holding her, trying to understand why the moment sparked the distant memory.

She stirred in my arms and came to relax so that I could see her face, half-covered by her tangled, dark hair and still tear-stained. This image brought on a strong emotion of protection and... and love. That's what it is, I love her... I don't know why I hadn't seen it earlier!

I take a hand up to brush her hair from her face and the urge to hold her closer washed over me but it wasn't because she was sexy, it's not because I'm a pervert, even if I am though I would never push that upon her. It's because I loved her and I wanted to be able to tell her how I felt without saying it...

I need to tell her. I have to speak the words to her so she knows that I'm here for her and that I would do anything for her just so that she can be happy. I'd give her up so she can be with him even if the imprint pull would kill me. I'll even leave her completely if she needs it, I just need to let her know that I love her.

"I love you, Shiloh," I almost coo lowly at her sleeping face. I swear I see her smile slightly at it.

I look out to the sunset and think of my mother, hoping that she knew how much I loved her...

"I love you... Paul..." I hear a quiet angel's voice say, looking down to her face. She was still asleep but slightly smiling though her brow showed concern and confusion.


	11. Chapter 11

**I will not try to explain myself :/ All I will say is I'm very sorry! But I'm here to write my next chapter so here we go :]**

I think I sat with her in my arms for an hour before I realised I had no idea where she lived still. The sun was another hour from setting and Serenity was in my house all by herself! Darn annoying, cute puppy. I either had to wake up Shiloh or just take her to my house... eh, she's too cute asleep, I'll just take her to my house.

I pick up her feather-light body and place her piggy-back style and walk on home, passing Sam's house. I see Emily on the front porch, making a curious smile my way. I put a finger to my lips and wink at her, I'm sure Sam told her or else she'd think I drugged this poor girl!

We, well I keep walking to my house for about 10 minutes before I get to my house and hear the whining of poor little Serenity. I open the door to my house and my ankles get attacked by her small but sharp teeth and I nearly drop Shiloh. I pull her back into my arms bridal-style and I take her up to my room and lay her on my bed... Oh shit, what if she wakes up in this hell hole! I start cleaning up my room, getting up Hot Pocket wrappers and dirty underwear and... why is there a bra on my t.v...? Trash? I think yes.

I pretty much had to fill up a garbage bag of junk I don't need in my room before you could call it stable for living. I had to do two loads of laundry to even put a dent in the dirty clothes! I don't see how I lived like this for so long...

In the middle of my mental rant, Serenity runs up to me and hands me a dirty sock. "I just don't see how you could even do that, pup," I say smiling, "but thanks for helping me, you know she means a lot to me, don't you?"

_Yeah, she means a lot to me, too._

This is just too weird.

_You're weird! Talking to an animal like I'm speaking, _she says, smiling I think? She sticks her toung out and I KNOW she is messing with me.

"I'm finishing with my cleaning before Shy wakes up, and if you're gunna help me, I suggest not touching the socks and underwear unless you want to die of poisoning," I say, all the while laughing, as she rolls her eyes at me. I lean down and pet her and I'd never heard a dog pur like she did and I almost doubled over when her eyes looked at me angrily and she growled at me.

We cleaned for a long while until it was about 11 and I went upstairs to check on my girl... I love how that sounds to me. I just wish it was completely true... I reached my door and I stopped, hearing her irregular breathing and.. sobbing? "Shiloh, are you okay?" I say, bursting in the door.

She was sitting up in my bed, holding the pillow against her legs, pulled close to her stomach. She was obviously upset, so I ran straight to her and pulled her to my lap like I did earlier, "What's wrong, Shy? Is everything alright?" I pulled her face to look at me in the eyes to search for reasons why she'd be so hurt. I stare in her eyes and I push to her mind to find thoughts and emotions. She's seeing his face and feeling guilty then she... she thinks of my face of when she first met me and of earlier today when we were playing on the beach and I feel her emotions of... maybe of love.

"Baby, you need to explain to me exactly what's bothering you, talk to me..." I say, pulling her hands into my own.

She looks down and takes a big breath, then looks back up to me, her emrald-gold eyes peircing and watery. "I didn't have a chance to talk to you about Tanner," she said, myself assuming it was Him. "I'm sure you've noticed that I'm not completely native, right?" I nodded for her to continue. "Well my tribe doesn't like that very much, since my father married an outsider that he fell in love with on a vacation when he graduated and had me. My dad passed away when I turned 12 and the elders of my tribe almost kicked us out of the rez until one of my relatives that just so happen to be an elder proposed that if I get married to one of the tribe members on my 18th birthday that we'd be allowed to stay and I was set up with many guys since then and Tanner is the only one that I actually liked so we got engaged and planned the ceremony the day of my birthday, which is next week and I'm just not ready to get married Paul, I'm not even an adult yet and I don't know what to do! I do love him, but I... I'm not in love with him..." she said, her voice cracking on love and throwing her face into the pillow. I hate to have to sit here and not know what to do with my imprint just crying right in front of me... so I just let go of her shaking hands and I pull her as close as I can without hurting her and rock her until she eases. I then thought of whenever I would get sick or when my father would hit me and Mom would start singing to me and rock me like am for Shiloh, the memory making me tear up a bit.

"Would you sing it to me?" the pillow said. I blush at what she asks, since I've never sang for anyone in my life... but I take a big breath and began to sing Bring On the Rain by Jodee Messina, but an octave lower since it is a woman, feeling so embarrassed and blushing as red as a fire truck, but I did it anyways.

Whenever I finished my song, she looked up at me with awe evident on her face. "...Wow, you were... your voice is... I would have never guessed that you could sing like that," she half-whispered to me. I looked away from her and blushed more than before, if possible. "I'm not even kidding you, you have a serious gift, Paul. People would kill for that voice," she said, a slight smile gracing her face but it faded when I'm guessing she remembered her dilema.

"Isn't there anything else you could do? You shouldn't be forced to do anything you don't want to do," I said, holding her face to look at me.

"If I want to be able to be in my tribe, I have to do this... I don't want to be exiled, Paul, I just can't do that..." she whispered, looking down at the pillow.

I sit there, thinking of how to reply to that... The Pack! "Shiloh, you know that you've always got a family."

She looked at me weird, like I was stupid. "What are you talking about? I just explained it, if I don't marry-"

I interupted, "You can come here and stay with me and the pack. Since I imprinted on you, you're a pack sister and part of our family, no matter what," I say, all the hope I can muster in my voice.

She looks up into my eyes, her hope slightly mirroring my own. "I never knew that they were my family, I don't even know them yet... but I can't leave my mom."

"Where is she? I can go get my truck and-" I feel her hand go to my mouth and I look at her, smiling and a bit flustered. "I need to meet the rest of the pack first, just slow down and get some sleep." She pauses for a second, getting out of my lap and looking down at her bathing suit and over-sized t-shirt. "Ummm can I borrow some clothes?" she said, smirking and blushing a tad. Wait... What did she ask again..?

She puts her hand on her hip and shifts her weight onto one leg. "You tell me Paul, what did I ask?" she said, grinning but managing to look annoyed and amused.

I look around and stutter out, "Uhhhh... Yeah, you look great in a bikini..?" It came out sounding like a question.

She pulled off the shirt and threw it in my face and started shuffling through my dresser. She pulled out a pair of pj pants and a shirt from when I was 14. "Excuse me for a moment," she said sarcasticly

"Down the hall on the right," I said, shaking my head at her cuteness.

"Uhmm when I said that, I meant leave," she said, humor in her eyes.

I got up, fake sadness on my face, my puppydog eyes staring at her. I get to the door and close it only for it to open right back up and have her throw her arms around my neck and hug me. "I hate when you do that, you make me feel like shit," she said, muffled into my neck. She stiffened then held me a bit tighter. She let go of me and the wouldn't look at me for some reason... What did I do this time?

"Uhh well umm.." she stuttered, "I-I'll be right back," then she turned and sped into my room, slamming the door. She really is and odd woman.


	12. Chapter 12

**I forgot how much I love to write, so I'm gunna continue writing every chance I get from now on :D My goal for this story is to finish it by the end of summer but it all depends on how many responces I get... So R&R please :3**

**~~April**

"I heard that!" she said, hearing me call her odd. She really is too good at that.

I lean against the hallway wall and wait for her to get finished... Ughhhhh I really hate having wolf senses... I can hear every movement she makes and every slide of fabric off of her...

"Hey, I can still hear everything you're thinking, you dumbass!"

Dammit.

I walk to the bathroom to throw some water on my face and I end up missing it completely and getting it all over my shirt. Nice. I take it off and head towards my door to wait for her to walk out. How long does it take to change?

"Oh shut up, Paul." She walks out of the room holding something shiney in her hand. A ring?

"If I could pierce you, you could hear me just as well as I can you," she said, but I only heard her subconsiously since I was distracted by her attire of my own clothing. That is going to cause a distraction.

She openned her mouth to speak but I interupted her, "Yes, I heard you that time, but... I don't know..."

She put her hands on my face and poked her lip out. "Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease Paul?"

... Ugh.

"Maybe," I said, sending her into and excited craze and making me smile at her adorableness... Is that even a word?

"I don't think so," she said, laughing at my thoughts. "What time is it?"

"Uhhh," I pull out my brick of a phone and read the time. "It's about 1:30, you need to get some rest, Shy," I say as she yawns.

"Yeah, speak for yourself," she said, touching the circles under my eyes. "Where's your blankets? I'll sleep down stairs."

I look around... Crap. "The only other blankets are in my parent's old room, and I haven't touched them since she..." She looked up at me sadly. I had already told her, the night I told her that I imprinted on her when she asked if my parents minded if she stayed the night. I stayed on the couch that day and the next morning I found my bed empty and I started to freak out until I found a note on my dresser that said she'd went to go walk Serenity and she walked in the door seconds later.

"I'll take my sheets to the couch, you can have the bed tonight," I say, walking into my room and pushing my blankets back. A small, soft hand stops my movements and pulls it away from the sheets. She had her eyes shadowed by her hair, her mouth was neutral, emotionless. She pulled her hand away from mine gently. I turn my body towards her and touch her face to look at her. She puts her hand on my bear chest and I feel a jolt go through my body. I don't care what she's doing anymore, just putty in her hands. That thought makes her smile, though I never managed to see her eyes...

She pushes me back onto my bed, more of a gentle kind of force really, but forceful still. I lean back and she stradles me then moves off of me and pulls the blankets onto her. What an ass!

"I know, couldn't help myself," she said, her voice muffled by the blankets since she hid her smile that was still evident in her eyes. How could I be mad at some one so cute? I can't be but I can be mean back.

"I'll let it go for tonight, but watch yourself tomorrow," I said to her, climbing into my bed beside her, though kind of regreting doing that since we've never slept together before...

"Just sleep, Paul," and she turned around towards the wall. My natural instincts were killing me, telling me to hold her but I just stayed where I was, staring at the ceiling, learning about self control and how it's a bitch. Her even breathing tells me she's asleep so I close my eyes and try to do the same. I feel her moving around and I look over to see her turning over and then puts her arm onto my chest like earlier, and the same jolt goes through my body. She scoots her body over and my wolf goes crazy with his pride at holding his mate. I pull my arms around her and kiss her head and lay her onto my chest, closing my eyes and finding it so much easier to sleep than I have in so long...


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey my lovely readers :] Here I am with a new chapter and I really hope you're liking it so far!**

**~~April**

As I fell into my dreams, I began to think about the whole mind reading thing... and I wondered if I could see her dreams, too... and then my head started to hurt a little... I tried to push into her mind and what I saw confused me. She was surrounded by animals in dark forrest. A deer, a bear cub, tiger cub, and... a joey? Weird imagination.. She was turned away from me so I couldn't see what she was holding in her arms... She starts walking forward, myself moving forward as well but I'm not walking, I guess I can't completely come into her world... It's like in a movie kind of... I can see it, but I'm not part of it. She comes to a stop at a little camp set up, old fashioned indian style, and I finally notice that she's wearing similar styled clothing, animal hide. She sits and I finally see that she's holding a baby wolf in her hands, dark grey and fast asleep.

... Wow.

A howl dreaks the nightly sounds of insects and nocturnal animals. She doesn't move a muscle at it, but she seems like she's waiting for something instead. After a moment, she looks up and near my direction and I notice that this woman isn't my Shiloh, but she had all of her other body features, but not her face. She looked sort of like my grandmother on my father's side that I'd known slightly, she passed when I was 5, but I knew that this woman was part of my family... But why would she be in Shy's dreams? I just don't get it...

I start to lose my will to stay in her dreams as I fall into my own. I haven't remembered my dreams since I started getting drunk every day with Jared, so when I woke up the next day, all I could remember of the night before was Shiloh's dream. That's interesting...

I keep my eyes closed, feeling if she was still there, and she was alright, but as I rubber her back, I realised something... Ughhhhhh she wasn't wearing a bra... I swear she does it on purpose.

I open my eyes and see her striking face, slobbering on my chest. I should think this was gross, shouldn't I? I just couldn't fine myself to think it was for some reason. After a couple seconds of thinking of what to do, I adjust myself onto my side and place my hands on her waist... then I start tickling the crap out of her and I see her eyes shoot open and a smile pop on her face as she starts to squeel and toss in my hold, then she starts tickling me back, and to my serious surprise, I am just as ticklish as I used to be as a kid. I stop tickling her and holding her away from me so she couldn't reach me... then we both stop and I look into her eyes and she looks in mine, my desire to kiss her slapping me in the face. She looks at my lips and I'm pretty sure she's thinking the same thing. She looks back to my eyes and she inces her face a bit closer but pausing and pulling back. I lean my face towards her still, she notices my movements but she doesn't make a move to stop me. I turn my head to the left and I kiss her cheek, then sitting up and getting off of the bed to grab a shirt.

"What do you want for breakfast?" I ask, trying to act like nothing happened, like that's all I was going to do but I knew she was smarter than that.

"Why didn't you do it?" I heard her small voice ask from behind me.

I turn towards her as I pull my clean, black shirt over my head. "I don't want to push you to do anything you don't want to do," I said, seeing her blush from the kiss, making my wolf howl.

She looked at me, showing her understanding, awe, and guilt push onto her face in one.

"I don't have any right to be with you any more than as a friend. You have a fiance and I respect that." I pause and look at the clock behind my back to see that it was only 9 and I turn back to see her infront of me. She looks up at me and pulls her arms around my neck and hugs me tightly. I pull my arms around her waist, squeesing slightly.

"I love you," I hear her whisper, making me hold her a bit tighter in my joy, "I love you, Shy."

We stand there, hugging eachother for a few more seconds then we part, her arms still around my neck and my hands on her hips. "Thank you, Paul, for everything."

"You're always welcome, babe, but you never answered my question." She cocked her head to the right.

"What do you want for breakfast?" I said, smiling at her.

She smiles back and takes my hand, pulling me out of my door.

"I think I want to eat at a fast-food place, you're buying!"


	14. Chapter 14

**Hope you're enjoying the story of it all :] I'm already planning out the main problem and the ending but I'm mostly just writing as I go! I'd really like to get some reviews guys, pleeeeeeeease! Just a few words, not much but I won't push for it :P I love you guys!**

**~~April**

We got home about an hour ago, I'm sitting up in my room, my face in my hands. She's down stairs, on my back porch, talking to Tanner. I'm not really sure how much more of this I can handle... In the diner, we were fine, laughing and enjoying eachother's company. We left from there in comfortable silence and came to my home - yes, I call it home now, when she's in it - and were watching Edward Scisorhands when her phone rang.

She looked at me sadly and walked out the door. I pause the movie, stand up and rub my face, and stayed there long enough to hear his voice on the other side of the glass door. I look at her outside, looking out to the forrest. I'd finally had enough and I went up stairs. And here I am, moping like a child, letting her slip through my fingers.

I walk down the steps to the living room and out to her side and I readh my hand out to her. _Let me see the phone, please,._ I thought, pushing it into her mind.

_Paul, it's not going to do any good. I'll just make everything complicated for him, _she thought back to me. "Well I'll talk to you about this later, I have to take care of Serenity," she said into her phone, and stops for a moment to let him say 'I love you', "You, too." She shuts her phone.

"He needs to know about me. It's not right to keep it from him." I pause to let it sink in to her. "I wouldn't do it to you."

She sighs and looks down to the ground. "I just did."

I just stared at her for a few seconds, my face feeling blank. "What?"

"I told him I was with you." 

"And what did he think about that?" I said, folding my arms.

She breaks a bit of a smile. What?

"He thinks you're gay."

"Why did you tell him that?" I said, feeling a bit apauled at her.

"I swear, I didn't say anything like that, he just assumes everything like that, doesn't like to think of me with other men that he doesn't know," she said, looking a bit annoyed and slightly releived.

"You have to tell him straight, Shy. You know that I'm not that harmless to you, my self control isn't what you think, and always seeing you in my clothes is driving me crazy as it is," I said, looking at my shorts that she rolled up to fit her, waist and legs, and looking at the tee shirt that she tied off to the side, fitting the summer well but driving me insane!

She looked at me in a bit of annoyance, for me this time. "I can go buy my own clothes if I have to," she said, looking away from me.

"Now that's not what I meant, I don't mind you using my clothes at all. My wolf just goes crazy and... wants me to go on my instincts." I look away in slight embarrasment, then I think outlound to her, "Why can't you just go get your clothes?"

She looked at me in shock and guilt. What all does she have to feel guilty for?

"What is it?"

"I ran away from home. My mom and tribe has no idea where I am. The only person I've talked to was Tanner, and he to my mother."

**Starting to get a bit juicey, isn't it? :D R&R please!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Not sure how this chapter is gunna go :P**

"So you ran away because...?"

"Because of the wedding, I guess, but Tanner just thinks I came to stay with 'Jessica' and she has a gay brother named Paul obviously." I was guessing he made that up himself. She knowingly looked at me.

"I think you need to meet your other family," I said, thinking of the Pack. Embry had already been in the pack before, Sam was a given, and Jacob joined soon after I did, bringing sooooooo much drama along with him. It was partly from his friend Quil not phasing but the rest was this stupid drama with a leech lover. We were suspecting that young Seth was going to join us soon so we were ordered to keep an eye on him.

"I've been meaning to take you to meet the pack and the mates but I wasn't sure that you'd want to...?" coming out as a question.

She looked up at me, seeming actually excited but then she looked serious. "Let me peirce you." I scowled at her.

"Do we have to do this right now?" I said, pouting at her.

"Paleeeeeeeeease Paulie?" she said, and I just knew it was a lost cause to say no anymore. I was going to have to do it sooner or later...

"Fine, but you owe me," I said, regretting that answer. "What size is it?"

"Well I wear 16's, and it's usually better to have identical rings sooooo..." she said, her sheepish smile making the news not as bad, but still bad.

"So am I going to work my way to it or are you just gunna do the 16?" I said, fearing for her answer.

"Well you being a shape shifter, I could most likely do a 16 while you're a wolf and it be no worse but it may feel stretched when you turn human..." Just the words make me get a headache.

"Oh hush, it's not that bad, and I do it for my animals all the time."

...Animal'S'?...

"I have more than Serenity. I have a tiger cub, a blue bird, and a -" I interupt her.

"A bear cub." She looks at me puzzled and I realise what I just said.

"How'd you...?"

"Lucky guess? I'll explain later, just come peirce my ear already," I said, walking to the door and pulling my shirt over my head. I slide the door open and unzip my shorts and throw them on the porch. I turn towards the trees and take off my boxers and phase. I turn back towards the porch and wait for Shiloh to walk out. She was staring out the window at me in surprise and humor and slight embarrasment. I sit down and stick my toung out at her, trying to make her come outside because of my cuteness, which I think worked because she openned the door and started towards me, smiling in humor. I duck my head down so that she could go ahead and peirce me but she didn't do it. Instead she started petting me, making me realise how awesome it is to have her attention. I let my front legs slip down until my chest pressed into the grass. She sat next to me, pulling my fur through her hands. She started to rub my paws in her hands and I leaned my head into her lap. I was so content and happy in this moment, I never wanted her to stop it. She started rubbing my ears and I swear I started purring like a fucking cat. I felt a small pinch in my ear, but I just thought she pulled a knot in my hair until I smelled the scent of blood. I looked up at her in awe and licked her cheek.

"That's gross, Paul," she said, grinning at me and rubbing her face of my slobber. I stuck my toung out of my mouth and grinned my wolfie grin at her. She leaned down and kissed my nose then stood up. I got up and walked to my boxers, unphasing and pulling them on and walking to my other clothes and taking them into the house. She was sitting on the couch and she was looking at me funny. I pulled my shirt over my head and she was still looking at me. "What?"

"You liked that, didn't you?" she said, smiling at me knowingly.

"Well... maybe I did, but you don't know that," I said, pulling my shorts on.

"Just admit to it already, I could tell. I'm not deaf, was that you purring by the way?" she said, smiling at me and stifling her laughter.

"Yeah yeah, okay so lets go ahead and go to meet the pack," I said, trying to change the subject.

"You admitted it! I made you purrrrrrrr!" she said, grabbing my hand and pulling me onto the couch.

"So do you want to go today?"

She paused for a moment. "I guess sooooo..."

I smiled at her and grabbed her hand. "Okay, lets go."


	16. Chapter 16

**I would have had this up sooner, but the site messed up on me. It's all good now though :]**

"Wait! I need to get some clothes first," she said, pulling me back by my hand.

She released my hand and put it on her hip, placing her other on her forehead. She stood there for a while, thinking about where she was going to get them I suppose.

I break the silence. "Do you want me to go get them from your house?"

She looks up at me and has an evil glint in her eyes. "Maybe I should help you learn patience," she said, her lips breaking into and evil, evil grin.

Before I knew what was going on around me, she'd pulled out a roll of money and she had me driving to the nearest clothing store. Which just so happens to be about an hour away. Fine by me, I get to spend it with her.

"Are you sure your just attached to me by the imprint?" she said, looking over at me with her humor shining in her beautiful eyes. That thought made her smile brighter.

I look away from her, to the road, and think of how to tell her. "Actually, I don't think the imprint has much to do with it anymore."

"Then what is it?" she asked, her voice nervous.

"Hey," I said, pulling her hand into mine, "there's nothing to be nervous about." I look to her and smile. "But about the imprint... It's deffinitly there and that's enough reason for me to want to be around you, but you're my best friend, Shy. I don't need the imprint to tell me that you're supposed to be with me because I can feel it for myself." I look over at her again, staring into her eyes. "I love you, Shiloh."

After a few moments of watching emotions fly over her face, I look back to the road and turn into a store. Wow, has it already been an hour? I park the truck and get out of it, walking over to Shy's side to open it for her while she fumbles with her purse.

"You didn't have to get my door, Paul. I just had to get-"

"It's fine, I don't mind doing things for you," I said, taking her hand and helping her out of the truck. She looked shocked to see me act this way. I didn't let go of her hand... and I don't think she wanted me to.

"Want to go in here or walk around?" I asked, looking at all of the surrounding places.

"Let's go in here!" she said, pulling me into a Victoria's Secret. I'm going to die.

She let go of my hand only to pick up what looked like lace held together by little peices of string. I personally like boy shorts, the kind that hang off the hips and only cover half of the ass. Shiloh smiled her little evil grin and picked up a pair of soft pink boyshorts, completely lace and see-through. I nearly had a heart attack when she kept them in her hand ans walked to the next part. She's trying to kill me, I swear it.

_You brought it upon yourself, Paulie! _she thought. She really IS trying to kill me.

She went around, picking up every pair of boyshorts, some kinda cute, some soooo very sexy. The sexy ones were the main ones she picked up and everytime she picked up a good pair, she looked up at me for what seemed like aproval and everytime I wonder why it mattered what I thought since they were for her. I gave my opinion anyway.

We ended up with 7 pairs, the extra 2 I picked out so I payed for them. I held my hand out for her bags and that same look of shock came on her face.

"Do I really seem that bad?" I asked, smiling at her and taking the bag. We walked over to the next store, Aeropostle. "Ewwwwwwww I hate that store," she said, dragging me down the sidewalk to a Hot Topic. "That's more like it."

I think I imprinted on a dangerous woman.

"Damn right, you did." She pulled me in and shufled through the merch.


	17. Chapter 17

**Woooohh I love you guys :]**

**~~April**

"I think you spent more on me than I did," she said, carrying 3 bags in each hand.

"So what if I did? I have to spend all of my money on somebody." I was carrying 6 in each hand. I look over at her. She was smiling at my slight sarcasm.

"You didn't have to spend so much, though." She gestured to the bags. I brushed off the comment.

"You know this is nothing, no big deal." I put down some of the bags and opened my door, pulling my seat up and putting th bags back there. "You can keep the other ones up front if you want." No response. I look over to her and see her pulling her shirt down and looking at it. "Like it?" she asked, it was a blue and black plaid thin-strap tank top with blue lace on every edge.

I stared at her in mock annoyance. "That's the shirt from that set in Victoria's Secret, isn't it." And that was my favorite of the day. She has officially killed me. "Yep, maybe I'll show you the whole thing later," she joked, knowing how much I wanted that but saying it anyways. Bitch.

"Oh come on, you know I'm funny," she teased, climbing into the truck and buckling up.

"Not really," I said, smiling at her.

We sat in comfortable silence for about 20-30 minutes until she asked, "So how much did you spend exactly?" I thought for a moment. "About $2,300. How much did you?" She looked shocked at me and thought for a moment. "About a thousand. Why'd you let me spend so much of your money?"

I shook my head at her and laughed a little. "I didn't let you spend any of it, I bought the stuff for you, not just you for you. Besides, I bought stuff for me and you bought lunch," I said, knowing I was right. She smiled over at me.

"Okay, maybe I should just get used to it." I looked over at her for a moment, seeing her dazzling grin. I looked back to the road but I didn't see road, I saw a sandy blur dart into the path of my truck and a howl coming from outside my window and all I can think to do is I have to protect her. As that thought goes through my head, I hear the metalic crunch of metal and I feel my arm and leg and a few ribs cracking and breaking in my body but my mind is on Shy. I can heal fast but she can't.

"Paul? Are you okay?" I hear an angel's voice say. I hear a howl near by and I can feel two protectors near me, but they aren't familiar. I realise my eyes are shut and I feel weak. I must be losing a lot of blood or something. Ughhhhh and I have to rebreak the bones if somebody doesn't do it soon. "Where's Sam..?" I ask, and the reply shocks me.

"He's on his way right now," says the Baby Clearwater. Seth? I open my eyes and sure enough, there he is in a pair of ripped jean shorts. "Are you..?"

"Yeah, you missed a little bit today bud." I shake my head. I must be dreaming this. "No, honey, I don't think you are," said my Shy.

"Do I really have to stay here until HE arives?" Nope, it's a nightmare.

"Shut up Leah, now's not the time to hear your shit." Seth has quite the mouth on him. The angel giggles at my words.

"Paul, are you alright honey?" says my girl. I will my eyes back open to see her face. I realise where I am and what had just happened to me.

"Holy shit, are you okay Shy?" I said, willing my right arm to touch her face. Fear comes to her face and she quickly puts my hand back onto the ground. "You really shouldn't move, we don't know what's broken yet." I try to look down at my body but her hand stops me. "Maybe you shouldn't see, it's not exactly pretty," she said, smiling at me sadly. "Do you not hurt?" she asked me, touching my face and worry creasing her brow. I remembered my problem from earlier. "Are you okay? Did you get hurt?" I said, moving just enough to ache a bit, but no more than that. "I'm perfectly fine, just a scratch or two and a few bruises. It's you I'm worried about," she said to me, looking over her shoulder at a tall figure. "Oh thank goodness. Sam, I know this is no way to meet me but I'm Shiloh, Paul's imprint." I'd never heard such beautiful words. She looked over to me and smirked. I looked up at Sam and he was smiling at her. "Welcome to our family, Shiloh. You've always got us here." I smiled at Sam's words and mentally thanked him. Sells the place well, he does.

"Help me out, Seth. We need to get him to the tree line so we can fix him up before it completely heals." Ahhhh shit, I forgot to tell her about our healing. "I'll be back in no-time, babe. Sam, is Emily around or did you come alone?" I asked. "She's over looking at Leah for wounds, even though I told her not to. Why do you ask man?" he spoke while he and Seth picked me up and carried me over. "Well do you think she could take Shy to your place so she's not alone? I want her to stay safe while I can't watch her." "Sure thing. Hey Em, why don't you and Shiloh go get aquainted at home, we'll be there shortly," he called over his shoulder then sat me down. He looked at my left side and frowned. "This is really gunna hurt, Paul." "I can handle it," I said to him, balling my fist as he took my arm in his hands. I hear a crack and I lose it all to darkness.


	18. Chapter 18

**Sorry I didn't post for a while, I payed for a while :P but I'm up and ready and full of ideas! I'll get to typing my readers!**

**~~April~~**

I hear a crack and it all goes to darkness...

But I'm opened up to the world that is my mind. What a crazy world it is.

The dream seems kinda like a movie, but instead of it being like in Shy's dreams and me being the camera guy, I'm the director in it. The scenery is a beach, not familiar, and a woman is sitting, watching the sun set. The woman I can see is obviously my girl. She looks lonely and I want to just go and share the sun with her until I see a man walking up. He had medium length dark hair and russet skin. Obviously native. He was tall-ish, not wolf tall or anything, but taller than her. His face I guess was decent, no homo. My first guess would be Tanner, if I didn't know any better, and he was smiling at her as she looked over to him. I look around myself and I notice that I'm inside of the tree line, away from this unfolding scene.

He walks to her and takes her hand so that she's standing and he goes down to one knee and pulls out a ring. Not my girl, bitch. I run to her but I don't touch her, I just flow right through her as if she wasn't there and my eyes go to the next scene on this beach.

It was Shy with Tanner, they were older, about 5 years and holding children. One little girl in Tanner's arms and a baby boy in Shy's. She looked so beautiful as a mother, showing a glow that I wanted her to only share with me. She had to be mine... The family fades away and the next picture of life comes to view.

I see Tanner and my girl, aged to perfection and about 50 years of age. The daughter looks almost as beautiful as her mother, about 25 and the son handsomer than his dad, looking a bit like Shy and about 18 I'd guess. The girl had a man on her arm and a baby was sitting on Shy's lap. They looked so good together but I just wish it was me...

Wait. This is my dream. I can make it what I want! I start it all over, like a movie and I'm asking for a second take of it. The unfamiliar beach switches to First Beach. I see Shiloh placed in front of me on a blanket, watching the sun set. I feel the aura of our atmosphere and it feels much more... intimate. I push her hair from her neck and I see bite marks on her and my wolf is going insane, I must have marked her! We're more than I thought... I leaned forward and she tilted her head to the side and I kissed the mark and I heard the sweetest noise escape her lips. She turns her head towards mine and I don't think my mind could have every imagined such a vivid creation as this kiss. It was simple but it's what I've longed for for months now. I pick her up gently and turn her towards me, her legs around my waist and sitting on my crossed legs. I start talking to her.

"Shiloh, I am already the happiest man because you have accepted yourself into my pack family and became part of my tribe. You live with me and take care of me as the woman in my life. There is nothing I'd rather be doing than spending all of my time with the love of my life. There is a few things I'd like to talk about though," I said, putting my arms around her waist naturally and her puting her arms around my neck. "I know that we've been the best of friends since we'd met and it all started from my imprint. Now that I was your brother, your best friend, and then," I paused and kissed her neck where my mark was, making her suck in a breath, "a lover, I have decided that I want to make you my wife. Will you marry me, Shiloh?" I look into her big emerald-gold eyes, looking for emotion, her reaction. She smiled wide and spoke the most magnificent word.

"Yes!"

And the scene goes into about 5 years later. I'm sitting on the beach, it's midday and I look down at the young boy in my arms, short dark hair, green-brown eyes, about 3 years old, looking just like I did when I was young. I look over to where I knew she was and I see my girl holding a baby girl, about a year old with dark brown curls in high pigtails and brown-gold eyes. Looks almost just like her mother. My family was the most beautiful thing and I almost cried looking at it. I look over to Shy, the same look in her eyes. I look down to her slightly bulged stomach, knowing that my baby was there. I leaned over to my woman and kissed her then her belly.

The scene changes to me looking at my son, obviously a wolf with how strong he looks, though he's only about 25. He was throwing a ball to a young boy, about 4, and looking over to a beautiful girl, his imprint I believe, next to my daughter who looks even more beautiful than the gorgeous girl before. There's another wolf boy helping my grandson with the ball, looking to be about 25 as my son does, but only about 19. He was looking over to my daughter and though I wanted to rip his head off, I knew she was his imprint and he was devoted to her. I look to my wife at my side and I smile at what we had created and I knew this is what I could have. This is what I will have.

I have to make Shiloh my girl.

"I love you, Shiloh. I will make you mine," I spoke, willing the dream to form to reality.


	19. Chapter 19

**Soooo sorry for my long time off here... had no computer until like yesterday. But I'll start right back off :] so I'll get to it! Very interesting chapter...**

**~~April**

I open my eyes to the low light of a lamp-lit room. I feel a soft, cool hand on my right one-maybe it's normal tempurature, but everything's cold to me. I didn't have to look to know it was Shy, I mean I could smell her a mile away and good thing because she smells amazing. That sweet honeysuckle scent makes my vision nearly blurred.

I guess she knew I was awake since she gripped my unharmed hand. Maybe she'd heard my thoughts... Wait... Maybe she watched my dream, maybe she felt the kiss like I did. I was afraid to move an inch since I may litterally be half-shattered, so I just squeezed her hand gently and rubbed the top of her hand with my thumb. We'd held hands before, but the feeling around the two of us was slightly more awkward but I felt the air was more intamate. She had to know the true feelings I have for her now, and that thought made me feel like I was naked... Was I? Nevermind, I felt the shorts. She giggled a bit at my thoughts.

"Paul..." she started. Oh crap, here it goes. I swear I could hear her rolling her eyes at me. "Can you look at me?" she said, worry and embarrasment lacing her voice, an aura of it surrounding us. I tried to lean up a little, my whole body shifting instead and I felt all of my wounds and bandages wrapped around me. I cringed and let my body shift back as Shiloh stood and gaped in her worry.

"Oh God Paul I'm so sorry I asked that! Please is there anything I can do? Ugh I'm so stupid..." I reached with my hand blindly to look for hers and found it immediately. I looked up at her standing form.

"I'm fine Shy, been through worse before," I spoke to her, my voice cracking from sleep. She forgot about her chair and sat on the edge of my bed, still holding my hand. It was quiet for a moment as she tried to figure out what to say. "Anything is fine, really, you know you can tell me anything," I said, still able to see her beautiful, blushing face. Wow, blushing? She never does that...

"Paul," she started again, "I'm really sorry I snooped in on your dream. It was wrong of me to be nosey... and I had no idea how you felt," she spoke to me softly. "Well of course I knew that you cared for me, and then there's the imprint, too." She paused. "But... that dream wasn't just the imprint. I'm not dumb, I can tell that much," she said, looking at our hands. "How much do you care for me, Paul?" she asked, looking to my eyes, mine snapping shut in frustration. I had always wondered how long it would take for the question to pop up. I let go of her hand and put it over my face. A feeling as strong as my imprint takes over my emotions, but it's the feeling of fear. Fear to lose her.

I tried to move my left hand, feeling that it wasn't completely healed but I decided that this is more important. I moved my right hand to my upper side and pushed off my bed. Shiloh started to freak out. "Paul! Lay your ass back down before you hurt yourself!" she screamed at me as I cringed and gripped the sheets, pushing myself into a sitting possition. She was standing now, still fuming at me, not wanting me to feel her worry though I could anyways. "You're gunna make it harder for you to heal like that! Just sit back Paul, please-" she was saying, but I put my hand on her lips to make her stop, using the strength I had to stay sitting up, but I knew this was something I needed to look in her eyes and tell her. "I'm fine, stop worrying about it. Like I've said, I've had worse and I'll have worse pains later on." I paused, finally looking her in the eyes and moved my hand to hers and pulled her to the bed again.

She sat next to me, her face about half a foot from my own. I placed my hand on the side of her face and started to say what might be my last words before she kills me.

"When I first looked you in the eyes, I didn't have to think for a second to know you were my imprint. My ancestors chose you to be my perfect mate. My pull made me think that I had a claim on you, and until that day on the beach, I was determined to have you. The imprint has that effect on me. But on that day, I realised that I wasn't promised my girl, that you were already taken from me before I knew I needed you." Her eyes grew large as my words sank in and her cheeks set red as she realised what I meant. She openned her mouth like she was going to speak, but I interupted her. "Wait, let me finish," I said, moving my hand to her mouth again. When she looked like she'd listen, I released her mouth and held her hand. "Shiloh, I know there's a lot I don't know about you like your knowledge of vampires and your stange abilities. And even if you don't trust me enough yet, I'll find a way to gain it," I said to her, my eyes burning into hers. "I want to know everything about you, where you come from," I squeeze her hand slightly, "and who you are. I want to know what you do when you're mad, when you're happy," I tilt my head and look up at her through my lashes, "and I want to know how you look in love." She looks away from me in a rush, removing her hand from mine and covering her cheeks. She was shocked at me, her guilt thick. I'm so sick of her feeling guilty for me.

I pulled her hand back into mine swiftly and turned her face to where she had to look at me. I had to get this through to her. "I'm tired of you feeling bad for me. I hate that her has such a claim on you but my whole goal is to do what I can to make you happy, which means let you be happy with or without me, but Shiloh," I said, barely above a whisper, leaning in towards her leaving a few inches from her, my eyes burning to hers and my hand on her cheek, "I don't know how much longer I can stand by and watch the girl I love loving another man."

I had expected her to look away. I was loathing the moment she'd walk away from me after I confessed. I had prepared my self a little for the impact her loss would have on me. I'd lose her, Serenity, my whole life was in her. I was sure that I woudn't survive the imprint pull, though of course I'd try to for her because that's what she would want. I would have never been ready to lose her, no matter how long I had.

I had expected her to look away, but she didn't. Her chin trembled and a tear ran down her cheek as she leaned in and shut her beautiful eyes, closing the rest of the space and placed her soft, rose lips against mine for the first time. Even my dream could never be so vivid as this. I ignore the pain in my side and arm as I place my other hand against her cheek, making the kiss deeper and sweeter. I felt her right hand gently touch my left one and soothed the ache.

We part lips and I lean my forhead against hers, trying to allow my nerves to unwind and I listen to her heart beating eratically. I move my hand from her flushed cheek to her waist and pull her to my side on the bed and I lay back down gently. I pulled her down to my chest.

We lie there for a while, comfortable and our emotions running wild. I feel her hesitance. "What is it?" I say, tilting her face so I can see her. She was crying and smiling slightly at me.

"I love you, too, Paul," she whispered, pulling up to kiss me again and nuzzled into the crook of my neck.

Yes, I was finally whole.


End file.
